Happy Birthday to Me!

I'm so glad my mother and dad gave birth to me! My hubby brought me home a cake! Last year I made my own and said all I want for my birthday next year is a cake!

I can't believe I haven't posted in so long but I've been trying to find myself again and God's plan for me. Depression got hold for a while and discouragement too. Especially with my weight after steroids. I tried Atkins and lost well doing it but my LDL went up! Then I joined Weight Watchers again and couldn't lose much because of flares and more steroids so I quit that. I avoided church because of fear of germs! Was that dumb?

Anyway I started having pains in my right upper arm and shoulder in November while doing water therapy. Didn't think much of it and Rheumy just said it was fibro. Then in January my neighbor fell and I helped lift him into a chair without thinking. Several days later the pain came back with a vengeance. Saw my orthopedic dr for that and got an injection. It helped really well. He scheduled PT but after 2 visits I couldn't tell if it was helping or not so I quit.

In April my grandson was getting out of the grocery cart and I grabbed him. Guess what? Pain again. Injection no help this time and PT no help. Time for MRI. Shows multiple bicep tears and a large bone spur digging into the rotator cuff. Surgery scheduled for August 14th. Dr. not sure if he has to do rotator cuff repair or not so of course I start getting worried. I'm supposed to take my annual painting seminar with Jerry Yarnell only 8 weeks after surgery. So my anxiety starts - will I be able to do it? I finally had peace yesterday after deciding that the dr doesn't know what he'll find but Dr. Jesus does know and I choose to trust Him. I emailed to cancel my seat. Even if I could paint at that time there's no way I could do it for 5 hours a day for 5 days. I need all my energy to heal and recover.

In the meantime I am using myfitnesspal app on my iphone to record what I eat and what exercise I do. Right now I can do 15 minutes on my recumbent bike. Last night during prayer time I said "forgive me Lord for what came out of my mouth today (had said some unkind words about someone) and forgive me for what I put into my mouth (had eaten several cookies)". And later today the birthday cake will be cut up and frozen in individual servings to eat in moderation!

Psalm 25:1

New International Version (NIV)

¹ In you, Lord my God,
    I put my trust.

If you're on twitter, please let me know and follow me @kylongarmer

I'm a little behind in posting! But that seems to be the way it goes sometimes - life gets in the way. Not really in the way this time though. In August we went to Camp Perry for George to shoot national competitions. He placed 3rd out of 503 people in the carbine match - so proud of him. I'd seen the rheumetologist before we left and she'd given me a prednisone pack to take with just in case I had a flare. Fortunately I didn't need it while there. I went out with the girls to some state parks and to Marblehead lighthouse and enjoyed lunches.

Made sure to balance activity and rest. I worked on a quilt for Christian and made good progress on it. Friday of that week I may have overdone and gotten over heated. Fatigue hit Saturday and by Monday after we got home, I was in a flare so started the prednisone. I actually had 3 days of NO pain! But then it slowly started back. Saw the rheumy again and too soon for more so am staying on the arava for another 6 weeks to see how that goes. It too has it's "issues" with running to the bathroom so since the methotrexate wasn't causing the problems, I may discuss going back on it when I see her in mid October. My neighbor was diagnosed with RA and recently had joint replacement on her thumb. I'll be glad to have someone local to talk about stuff with now. Cooler weather is finally happening so I've started walking outdoors a little each day. I will probably stop the water aerobics as it is just too much of a hassle to get there. Maybe if/when our Y ever gets their own pool I will start going again but in the meantime I've pulled my exercises for range of motion and strengthening and with the walking and my recumbant bike, I think I can get a routine going to keep moving. Joyce and I painted roses last month and mine got sold as soon as I posted it on FB even though I hadn't planned on selling it.

 

Today is another painting day and we hope to start a new painting called First Love. Then in a couple weeks we go to the Jerry Yarnell painting seminar. Can't wait for that. My stress levels have been pretty high so I'm hoping that will help.

Three weeks after stopping the mtx injections and yesterday the pain hit all over. I managed to finish putting binding on BJ's quilt and pushed through some laundry. He is 6 and has cerebral palsy, sensory integration disorder, and autism. He seems to like Handy Manny so I found a coloring book and enlarged one of the pages and made a fusible applique. They can play what's this color or where's this tool with it.  It's been 3 1/2 weeks since I had the ultrasound on my liver and still no results! Monday I will try to talk to the office manager. Last night the pain in my side was so bad I had to get out the heating pad and take a percocet. I have a high tolerance to pain so I try not to take narcotics unless absolutely necessary. If that hadn't worked I may have gone to the ER which I never do! The pain settled after about an hour and I was finally able to go to sleep. This morning feels much better in that area.
I've bought fabric for Christian's quilt. He wanted football so I emailed 3 pics and bought all 3 actually because I needed them for the pattern. I will get them cut out and then put it together while we are in Camp Perry later this month. George will be competing in shooting there. I also located fabric for Dylan. He wants horses so I have to wait and get his approval before I order those. Haven't found a specific pattern for him yet though.
The other night on PBS was a show called Quilts of Valor. I make about 3 quilts a year for that project and love doing it. My dad was stationed at Panama Canal during WWII and I always wanted to contribute something when the US was in a war situation so this is my way. It's an awesome program and when you're doing things for others, it does help take away some of your pain.
We finally have some cooler temps but still no measurable rain - hopefully tonight!

The fourth of July is now over and I can't say I will miss the fireworks. The heatwave and drought mixed with bottlerockets had me a little worried. But fortunately no problems except falling asleep in what sounded like a war zone outside!
Today is a new day and God's mercies are new each day! Do you know how much He loves you? I was watching Joyce Meyer yesterday and she said a lot of people say they love God but they don't really know that He loves them! It changed my life when I realized that and that because of that I love myself!
I have a pet peeve with Facebook and some of my "friends" who are called Christians. When they get angry or a little upset, they tend to verbalize all kinds of cursing and post photos of things with bad language in them. I was going to post about that until I found a bad word coming out of my mouth yesterday and was convicted of what I had done. So I immediately asked forgiveness and for God to put a watch over my mouth! Praise God He is quick to forgive!
It's been two weeks without an mtx injection and I am actually feeling pretty decent. My fingers I think will always ache but so far it's nothing intolerable. I am trying to learn Dragon software so that I won't have to type as much. That does hurt my fingers and wrists a lot. So far I am struggling with it and may have to go back and do the voice lessons with it again. I will persevere with it because it's a great tool for anyone with hand/finger/wrists problems!
It's been too hot to work on my lion painting so I am sorting and decluttering my sewing room which is in what should be a formal living room. I am moving it all upstairs where my longarm is. Then after painting the room we will buy a small sofabed so that we'll have someplace for guests to sleep. I've gotten rid of a lot of stuff I haven't used in a while. Now just to load it into the car on a cooler day and take it to DAV.
Guess that's enough for today.

I've probably had Systemic Lupus for 20 years but was only diagnosed officially in 2010. Most of those years were being told I was hurting because I was depressed but I knew I was depressed because of the hurting! Things came to a head after 3 major surgeries and finally got treatment starting with plaquenil. For me it helped a lot until Rheumatoid Arthritis was thrown in after another surgery in 2011 - my 2nd knee replacement. Then began methotrexate injections that I gave myself for about a year. In May of this year I started having some side effects with my liver so those have been discontinued and may go on arava in another month. I've been praying about this because it too has liver/kidney side effects. Still waiting on an ultrasound result. This week with no injection has been good though. I've had more energy and able to do a little cleaning. Of course I continue to rest and not over do things. Very important with autoimmune diseases. And I was able to enjoy painting with my friend Joyce this week without being nausious or fatigued. We're struggling through a lion. He's pretty funny looking right now but I plan to work on him more and get him finished for my son-in-law's birthday gift in August. Jesus is the Lion of Judah and Brian is a very godly man so I hope he likes it.